Apathy, Oh, Apathy

I am emphatically NOT a morning person. This is a fact which is rather ironic considering that I’ve spent the majority of my working life starting work by 6-6:30 am, including over 4 years of operating a Bed & Breakfast, getting up by 5:30 to start preparing. It’s a dichotomy, because I love the early morning as the world around me wakes up, especially when I’m holding a steaming hot cup of coffee. If I could somehow manage it, my ideal sleeping arrangement would consist of my bed on a screened porch, open to the sounds and smells of nature (i.e. the ocean and surf) with a coffeepot right next to the bed, ready to flip the switch. Could it be any better? Snuggled under the blankets with the indoor critters, and all with that beauty around you?

Eventually, I know, I have to get up and stop dreaming….. but I don’t want to! I want nothing more than to lie there, boneless and driftting, letting apathy carry me along. Why get up when it feels so nice to stay where I am? Reality creeps in, steps in, screams in, or sometimes stomps in, shattering the peace. I can jump up in anger and frustration, or I can take a deep breath and focus on this selection from the Psalms:

“I lift my eyes toward the mountains. Where will my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.” – Psalms 121:1‭-‬2 HCSB

My personal peace is rather fragile right now. I’m really struggling financially and haven’t found a job since I left my last job (involuntarily) over 2 years ago. I’m in a rather deep hole of debt, and there are things that need to happen quickly for me. I’d be lying if I said I’m not concerned, and I tend towards worry at times, but my GOD is so good at reminding me that HE is in complete control of the situation. The situation looks hopeless to me, so I have to look for my Hope in Him and remember, again, David’s words: “My help, my HOPE, comes from the LORD….”

Where do you find your hope? In your spouse? That’s dangerous. They can change their minds and leave in a heartbeat. In your children? They have to make their own way in the world, and even though they can stay close, they cannot be your everything. What about your job? It’s so easy to get wrapped up in our jobs and careers and feel like we are on top of the world, only to have someone higher up decide you are no longer relevant. Is the hope in financial security? Financial security in this day is an oxymoron. Perhaps your hope comes through religious rituals and the rote repetition of prayers and petitions to a priest or some vague ‘higher power’. All of that is man-made and doomed to failure because of man’s fallibility.

The only Hope we can depend on, no matter where or what or when, is the Hope we find in the SAVIOUR, our LORD JESUS CHRIST. Not in man, who will always fail us and disappoint us.

“My help – my HOPE – comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.”

My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.”

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