“To learn, you must love discipline; it is stupid to hate correction…. Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others. A fool is quick-tempered, but a wise person stays calm when insulted.” – Proverbs 12:1, 15-16 NLT
Love discipline, listen to others, stay calm, don’t take offense. In these verses, God isn’t talking about the kinds of “discipline” that abusive, controlling people use. I’ve been there, lived through it, and there is nothing godly or good in abuse masquerading as discipline.
Whoever wrote these words in Proverbs, whether King Solomon or someone else, managed to reach across the millennia and slap me up side the head. I don’t think I’ve ever taken being disciplined very well. Whether it was being scolded by my parents when I was little, or bosses, or my husband, or friends, I don’t like being told I am wrong. I wrapped myself in self-righteousness and used anger as a shield to protect myself. At first, with my husband, it was to protect myself from his belittling words and from his anger. Holding in all of the fears and anger; unable to really talk to anyone, I became cold and angry. The only way I could cope with it was to withdraw and to control whatever slivers of my life I could. Eventually, nothing I did – in his eyes – was good enough, so I defended myself the only way I could see. Anger.
When I did talk to anyone, I hid the realities of my life. Both fear of reprisal and pride kept me from reaching out. How could I admit to such a grievous error in letting myself become entangled in such a relationship? Through this first marriage, I came to know myself as a person with no value. Since my pride kept me within myself, I built walls of control and temper around my heart. I know now that those were all lies of the enemy. I still don’t like discipline, and it is too easy to want to always be right. Staying calm when challenged with everyday life, and not reacting in anger when insulted or when someone is rude, can be difficult. Whenever those provocations occur, I try to remind myself that that person could be in pain. Physically, or emotionally or spiritually. We don’t know what they are dealing with in their own lives. We are told by our bosses to keep our personal and business lives separate… but is that really possible?
To remain calm in the face of insults or confrontations is never easy. It is a process to learn to give up that anger and let the Holy Spirit deal with it. Holding on to anger and resentment doesn’t do anything good for the person who is holding it, and it doesn’t affect the one we are angry at, at all. These three verses may be the ones I need to put on my bathroom mirror as a reminder! GOD is Good. Through thick or thin, good or bad, sickness or health, riches or poverty, hell or high water, He is with me and willing to help me out anytime I ask. Remember, He is a gentleman and He won’t step into the fray without an invitation.
“The Lord is my Shepherd; I have all that I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; He leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to His Name. Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for You are close beside me. Your Rod and Your Staff protect and comfort me. You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings. Surely Your Goodness and UNFAILING LOVE will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will live in the house of the LORD forever.” – Psalms 23:1-6 NLT
GOD will exact justice and revenge on all who have hurt His children, so we have no reason to even try in our lifetimes. Let it go! Until that time, hold tightly to Jesus, our Rock and our Salvation. Amen!
(All scriptures quoted from http://bible.com)