Tag: #suffering

Trust and Believe

Trust and believe. These two words are different, but I find them used interchangeably in the English language. To trust someone, we must believe that person, and to believe in that person, we must trust them. I found this quote while researching these words and their meanings at http://www.englishstackexchange.com:

“If someone gives you an [sic] information and [you] find out that the information is true, then you will believe. Belief is to accept something as being TRUE …”

On http://www.dictionary.com, Trust is defined as a “firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something,” while Belief is defined as “an acceptance that a statement is true or that something exists.” Interesting how they overlap. Can trust exist without belief? Can you believe without trust? In scriptures, especially in the Gospels of the New Testament, we are admonished alternately to trust in God and to believe in God. Example: Jesus is speaking with His disciples at their last Passover meal together, and He answers Peter with these words:

“Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Trust in GOD, and trust also in Me.” – John 14:1 NLT

Trust. But in the ESV, NIV, and the KJV, the word believe is used in place of trust. “Believe in GOD, and Believe in Me.” I don’t see how it is possible to have the one without the other. You have to trust God to believe Him, and you must believe in Him to trust in Him. Maybe, it is easier to unstand it this way:

“Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Believe and Trust in GOD, trust and believe also in Me.”

I believe that GOD is Real. I mean, look around you. Do you seriously believe this world and the stars and planets evolved from nothing? (If you say “space dust,” I reply, “And where did the space dust come from?” I could go on all day! 😎 ) Like l said, REAL. See, easy to believe. I trust God; I trust in GOD. Sometimes my trust waivers, because of all the ugliness and hopelessness I see and experience in the world….. but my belief holds firm. Maybe, just maybe, the scholars who worked so hard to translate the scriptures in English under King James had it right when they used believe, rather than trust. With GOD, belief for me comes easy. Trust, on the other hand, is difficult at times because man (men) has broken trust with me so many, many, times.

“Trust in the LORD always, for the LORD GOD is the Eternal Rock.” – Isaiah 26:4 NLT

“It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in people. It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in princes.” – Psalms 118:8‭-‬9 NLT

The LORD is the Rock. Man will always fail us and hurt us and disappoint us. The LORD will not abuse your trust, but you must believe Him, believe in His Son, and believe His Words in order to gain that trust. Sometimes, like the father whose son was desperately ill, we just have to say, “I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!” – Mark 9:24 NLT

It is our choice to stay in our state of not trusting anyone, or we can open our hearts and arms to the only One Who will NEVER hurt us or stab us in the back….. don’t blame me for my trust issues, just show me the One to Trust.

I Am STRONG …… (Um, no, not really)

“I can do it myself ….. pull yourself up ….. anything you can do, I can do better ….. I am woman, hear me roar ….. don’t be a whiner, just do it …..”

Any of these sound familiar to you? Like so many societies before us, we preach self-sufficiency and to depend only on ourselves. Well, just let me ask you this : how’s that workin’ out for you? For me, not so good. Depending on my strength, and being dependent on another person, has let me dig a hole of debt and despair bigger and deeper than I was in before; deep enough that I can’t possibly get out on my own. Paul addresses this in a letter to the Corinthians, where he references back to the exodus of the Jewish people as they left Egypt.

“If you think you are standing strong, be careful not to fall. The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And GOD is Faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, He will show you a way out so that you can endure.” – 1 Corinthians 10:12‭-‬13 NLT

I’ve been proud of my strength. Working in different areas of tne building trades, I strove to be as good as any man on the crew. No, I always wanted to be seen as better than any man…. “as good as” wasn’t good enough. I stocked 50# boxes of nails and screws, and 80# buckets of drywall mud, I loaded lumber and plywood and sheetrock; I carried 90# rolls of roofing and bundles of shingles up ladders. I tried to out-ride my friends on horseback; I climbed rock faces; I taught myself to ski; I wanted to out-dance any of the others. I was, simply put, a show off. My pride was my downfall then, and it is still a thorn in my side. Because of my pride, I have had multiple surgeries to repair damage I did to myself while determined to be the best, using only my own strength. If I had relied on God instead of myself, I think I could have avoided some of the injuries. Not my strength, not letting my pride push outside my physical limits, but believing that God made me to be myself, His child, sufficient unto Him.

Now, because I had to have a bigger and better house, and more “stuff,” and then I lost my job and depended on a man’s committment to me to support this lifestyle, I find myself in that deep hole I was referring to earlier. Depending on man will always leave us wanting. Learning to depend wholly and completely on God is scary. I’m learning to pray “YOUR Will be done, not mine; not my strength, LORD, but Yours. Not riches, but enough. Amen.”

I want to work, and I hope I can stay where I am. Pray for me to be open to whatever it is God is telling me. Pray that I will rest in HIS Strength, rather than my own.

Spirit Guide – The REAL Thing

“For the whole law can be summed up in this one command: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ …. So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves.” – Galatians 5:14‭, ‬16 NLT

In New Age teaching, you have a spirit guide to help you through life. How ironic that they have pulled it straight out of the scriptures they despise. For a time in my life when I was very troubled and looking for help, I became involved in that thinking, thanks to a ‘counselor’ I went to who encouraged me to it. She encouraged me in looking at ‘past lives’ – I apparently was a black woman, a slave, during the Civil War – and through this counselor I was introduced to my ‘spirit guide.’ This is what I can tell you about that time: the New Age movement is not about bringing truth and light into your life. Oh, it starts out that way. My ‘spirit guide’ came to me (in my mind) as a beautiful, shining woman, eager to help me on my way. It took a very short time, because I didn’t follow her unquestioning and meekly, before this beauty resorted to her her true form – and it was far from pretty. It (not a ‘she’, as I had thought) morphed into a twisted, ugly imp with ragged teeth and claws instead of fingers and toes. It was unquestionably one of Satan’s followers, whose job was to drag me far enough down that I couldn’t find my way back to my LORD.

Oh, people, I pray you can hear me! If these things can happen to a CHRISTIAN, how much easier is it for unbelievers to be dragged into the pits of hell?? I have experienced hell on earth, and my heart breaks for the millions of people who are sucked into these things every day. The only Spirit Guide we need is the Holy Spirit! GOD Almighty, Creator, as our Father, JESUS CHRIST as our Advocate and our Brother, and the HOLY SPIRIT as our Spirit Guide – this is all we need to truly live, both here on earth and for eternity. It took a miracle to break me out of that life, and I praise GOD for my deliverance. Leaving it, just walking away, isn’t humanly possible. It requires divine intervention, and I am forever grateful for my freedom. Once Satan lures you into his lifestyle, it is so easy to get sucked back into it. This experience was second time becoming involved in it – up front, on the surface, it seems like such a good thing. The enemy wants us trapped in the quicksand of his lies and deception, and he absolutely hates it when someone gets free. He pursues the escapees with all of the vengeance he has, and sends his legions to harass and create difficulties and harm from those people. He throws up roadblocks and puts every enticement in front of us.

Even now, years after, he is out to destroy our lives; my life. I put my Hope and my Trust in my LORD Jesus Christ. He put His Angel Army around me to protect me, and He gave me His Holy Spirit to guide me through the darkness and despair.

“O LORD, You have examined my heart and know everything about me. ….. I can never escape from Your Spirit! I can never get away from Your Presence! ….. but even in darkness I cannot hide from You. To You the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to you. ….. Search me, O GOD, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends You, and lead me along the path of Everlasting LIFE.” – Psalms 139:1‭,7‭,12‭, ‬23‭-‬24 NLT

HALLELUJAH! My chains are gone! Will you allow Him to release you, today?

Thank GOD My Yesterday Is Gone

“All my Hope is in Jesus, Thank God, my yesterday’s gone, I’ve been washed by the Blood…. ”

Crowder, in his new song, talks about a man who has been released from prison and is greeted by his friends and family. This man knows what it means to be released from physical bondage. Not just the bars and shackles of a prison, but the spiritual bonds of his sins. These bonds of the spirit are every bit as real as the steel bars and chains of prison; in fact, in many ways the bonds of sins are incredibly stronger than anything man can put on you. Spirit bonds can dominate your life, and the enemy of life wants us to stay in these bonds. I know, because I have spent most of my life caught up in those chains. We commiserate with the people who are in physical slavery today, and we hurt for the way many of our ancestors were treated, but what about all of the spiritually imprisoned? We can wear a ribbon showing our support for those caught up in human trafficking, and we donate to causes to save the baby whales/seals/etc. We get angry at the inequalities and inequities around the world. We fight to save puppies and kittens, while killing our own human babies. We argue for the rights of “dreamers” while using pornography and prostitutes to satisfy the lusts of our bodies.

What a messed up world. Just writing that paragraph made me a little sick to my stomach. Satan, aka Lucifer, the god of darkness and pain and despair, is dancing with happiness at the state of humanity.

What can a single person do to fight the darkness? Call on JESUS! He is the Light, our Saviour; King of kings, LORD of Lords, Son of the LORD GOD Almighty, Creator. He will stand with us as Advocate when we stand in front of Judge and Jury of the Great White Throne on Judgement Day. He stands with us, with me, today and every day I allow Him to be there. He rescues us from the sin and darkness; all we have to do is ask, and He will remove the shackles and chains we have bound ourselves in. Come to Jesus for Redemption and Forgiveness at the foot of the cross. He is waiting patiently, with NO judgement or condemnation. So remember this, if you don’t remember anything else: “All my Hope is in Jesus, Thank God, my yesterday’s gone, I’ve been washed by the Blood…. ”

“And so, LORD, where do I put my hope? My only Hope is in You.” – Psalms 39:7 NLT

I’m Not Religious

“That is what the Scriptures mean when they say, “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what GOD has prepared for those who love Him.” …. But people who aren’t spiritual can’t receive these truths from God’s Spirit. It all sounds foolish to them and they can’t understand it, for only those who are spiritual can understand what the Spirit means.” – 1 Corinthians 2:9‭, ‬14 NLT

I don’t really care for people calling me “religious.” To me, religion is something people do to show to the rest of the world how “good” they are. I’m not “good”, and there is no way that anything I can do is going to get me to heaven. There aren’t enough Hail Mary’s, and there aren’t enough sacrifices or prayers to wash me clean enough. No, I have enough sin in my past to keep me as far away from God as there is distance. Blessed be His Holy Name, this is exactly where Jesus Messiah meets us! I can’t do enough, but He can do EVERYTHING. My mind can’t comprehend any love that big, and that’s exactly what verse 9 is telling us. “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what GOD has prepared for those who love Him.” I can’t see it, I can’t hear it, I can’t even imagine what God has for me. It’s difficult to even think that He loves me; that Jesus LOVED me, enough to leave heaven and come here to cover me with His saving Grace.

Think about this. If Christians have a hard time understanding how deep and how wide our Saviour’s Love goes; how all-encompassing His Love is, how can the unbeliever, the spiritually parched, believe it? LORD, don’t let me be perceived as religious by the world. I pray that the unbeliever will see a difference in me, and that they will want to know how to achieve that peace for themselves. Especially through this time of trial, help me to remain faithful to You and Your commandment. Help me to maintain my faith in You, and my belief in Your faithfulness to me. As I stumble through this time, I know I am not alone and I pray that I recognize Your Strength as You carry me. Show me how to be spiritual, and not religious. Help me remember this: “He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west.” – Psalms 103:12 NLT AMEN.

Love Your Enemy

“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” – 1 Corinthians 13:4‭-‬7 NLT

God didn’t tell us we could pick who to love. No, He sent His Son to us, Who taught us these lessons:

“Jesus replied, “‘You must love the LORD your GOD with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ ” – Matthew 22:37‭-‬39 NLT

Short and to the point. Jesus is referring to a passage in Leviticus 19, verses 9-18 when He says to love your neighbor as yourself. Read it – it may help with your understanding the point. I’ve read Bible scholars who say that Jesus is referring to fellow believers when He says ‘neighbors’; I think they should read the story of the Samaritan in Luke 10:30-37. This terribly injured Jew was left for dead by robbers, and a priest and then a temple assistant passed him and left him to suffer rather than sully their hands. A Samaritan, a people despised by the Jews and who in turn hated the Jews, picked up this man, his enemy, and cared for him and provided for him. Who was the real neighbor? Certainly not the man’s fellow Jews! The Samaritan showed love to his enemy. Shouldn’t those of us who have experienced the Love of the Savior lead by example in loving our enemies; our neighbors? Both Luke and Matthew record several instances of Jesus talking about loving our enemies.

“Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for He is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked.” – Luke 6:35 NLT

Even as Jesus showed His love as He was dying, by asking God His Father to forgive those who tortured and crucified Him, so we need to forgive those who hurt us. Yes, I am all too human and know EXACTLY how difficult it is, especially when the hurt is new, or the person is completely unrepentant. In fact, I’m currently dealing with it, even as I write these words. Knowing that the LORD has forgiven me for much, I know that He expects me to forgive others the same…. and more. There are many, many scriptures that talk about forgiveness. Not forgiving, and fostering anger and hurt in my heart, doesn’t do anything to my enemy, it only harms me. The greatest thing we can do, after prayer for our enemy, is to love them. Most times it has to be done at a distance, especially if that enemy caused us physical harm, and we shouldn’t forget, lest we get into another bad situation. Forgiveness is only through Jesus Christ and His Love.

“So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have Loved you, you should love each other. ….”If you love Me, obey My commandments.” – John 13:34; 14:15 NLT

Safe….?

“(10) The Name of the LORD is a strong fortress; the godly run to Him and are safe. (14) The human spirit can endure a sick body, but who can bear a crushed spirit? (19) An offended friend is harder to win back than a fortified city. Arguments separate friends like a gate locked with bars. (24) There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.” – Proverbs 18:19‭, ‬24 NLT

A crushed spirit. That’s what happens in a relationship and a marriage when one leaves, physically or emotionally. I’ve had plenty of opportunities to study on this; too many opportunities. Currently, I find myself again feeling betrayed by a friend, a person I took at his word that he would not abandon me. A crushed spirit. Knowing a person for almost 20 years, being friends and going through good and bad times, helping each other through emotional times, doesn’t guarantee anything. I wanted to believe the best, but everyone lets down their friends at times. Why do we do this? Why make promises we know we won’t keep? Why do we lead others on, letting them believe something in error? Safe? No, there isn’t anyone on earth who is safe, who won’t disappoint you.

No matter how long or how much effort we put into the study of human behaviour, I believe we will always be disappointed, simply because we are human and full of flaws. Knowing that, studying that, doesn’t make it any easier to get past the hurt. The only way to really get past it, to find forgiveness for those who hurt us – and that includes forgiving myself for the hurt I have caused myself and others – and that way, the only way, is through Jesus Christ. Can I still forgive while being treated with disrespect and disdain? Do I want to? I study the scriptures for guidance, because I cannot find forgiveness in my heart. Instead I find sarcasm and anger flooding me, along with the hurt and the disappointment. All of those feelings come straight from the enemy, and they don’t help me at all. In fact, if I let them go, these negative thoughts and feelings can overcome and actually, physically, cause me to be ill.

With Jesus, and through the healing of the Holy Spirit, I can get through this. Study the words of Jesus for forgiveness. He taught us this: “But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.” – Matthew 6:15 NLT

Jesus was betrayed by a friend, a close friend who He loved, one who gave Him over to be tortured and killed in the most horrific ways know to man…. and before He died, Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” – Luke 23:34 NLT

Even while dying; beaten, bruised, and humiliated, Jesus forgave us. Are we beater than the Son of God, that we can hold judgement and unforgiveness over another person? Let the chains of hatred, unforgiveness, anger, and hurt go. Let God have it. He can handle it.

Fully Committed; Fully Transparent

What does that mean, “fully committed”?

“The eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him. What a fool you have been! From now on you will be at war.” –
2 Chronicles 16:9 NLT

Interesting verse. How many years did I struggle through, simply because I was not fully committed to God? Reading this certainly explains the trouble and hurt of those years! At war – fighting to maintain my control. MY control; MY choices. Not asking God for answers or guidance, thinking I had it all figured out. At war – but not allowing the army of angels, GOD’s army, to fight my battles. Like a 2 year old, I said “I can do it!” How’s that working out for you? Even now, it often feels as though I’m at war with the world. There is so much much ugliness and meaness, much of the time I just want to retreat into my home and not venture out.

Paul reminds us how we should be thinking and acting in his letter to the Ephesians:

“And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” {Psalms 4:4 NLT: “Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Think about it overnight and remain silent.”} Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil. ….. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” – Ephesians 4:26-27, 31-32 NLT

I confess I am struggling with anger right now. It is a real struggle not to be furious at my life partner (or so I let him convince me we were) for suddenly leaving. Anger at him for lying to me that he would not leave, anger at the financial bind I am in because of losing his support, and a lot of anger at myself for 《again!!》 letting myself become dependent upon a human man and pushing my relationship with my LORD aside. Bitterness wells up in my heart anytime I dwell on the situation, and harsh words and slander are ready to slip off my tongue with very little encouragement.

Instead of allowing this anger to control consume me, as the enemy wants it to do, my focus has to remain on scriptures and my Jesus. How will the mortgage get paid the first of next month? At this point, with my efforts, and my financial resources, it won’t be covered. The human in me is worried and almost sick about it. The Sprit residing in me tells me worry won’t fix it, and any anger at him I hold on won’t help any, either. Only by letting God have this, by fully committing to Him, holding nothing back and surrendering completely, will I survive this. Do you understand how hard that is? I can’t do it. Pulling myself up by my bootstraps won’t cut it.

“I trust in you, my God! Do not let me be disgraced, or let my enemies rejoice in my defeat.” – Psalms 25:2 NLT
“I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!” – Mark 9:24 NLT

Proverbs

PRO-VERB
ˈprävərb/
noun
plural noun: proverbs
a short pithy saying in general use, stating a general truth or piece of advice.
synonyms: saying, adage, saw, maxim, axiom, precept; words of wisdom

“The proverbs of Solomon son of David, king of Israel:
for gaining wisdom and instruction; for understanding words of insight;
for receiving instruction in prudent behavior, doing what is right and just and fair;
for giving prudence to those who are simple, knowledge and discretion to the young –
let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance –
for understanding proverbs and parables, the sayings and riddles of the wise.
The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.” Proverbs 1:1-7

Good advice, from the man called the wisest man (and also the richest!) ever to live on earth…. I began reading these, again, a few years ago while I was involved in a Christ-centered recovery program. There was a lot of emphasis for my healing on Proverbs 16:9. It kept reminding me that I am not in control of my life; that in spite of my pride and controlling attitude, my idea that “I’ll do it myself,” God was – and IS – the One in control. That’s a hard thing to acknowledge for a person who has suffered emotionally and physically at the hands of others. I had to drop the pretense that I was perfect and recognize that I wasn’t always right. This is a battle still being fought today and every day, as the enemy seeks to pull me away from my LORD, Jesus Christ.

“We can make our own plans, but the LORD gives the right answer. People may be pure in their own eyes, but the LORD examines their motives. Commit your actions to the LORD, and your plans will succeed. …. Better to have little, with godliness, than to be rich and dishonest. We can make our plans, but the LORD determines our steps.” – Proverbs 16:1‭-‬3‭, ‬8‭-‬9 NLT

We are all in the battle against the enemy Satan. He wants us to believe that we have it all together, that we know better than the GOD of the Universe. Sounds a little silly, especially when we consider that this amazing, all-powerful God knew us before any man even imagined our existence. He knew me in my Mother’s womb, as I was being knit together in the fabulous way He designed. ( Read all of Psalm 139, and Job 10:11). I struggle with verse 8 of Proverbs 16. America is a land of riches, and I see the people around me adding to their “stuff” on a daily basis. If you disagree, take a look outside on trash day at the full-to-bursting trash receptacles and the overflowing recycle bins. Stuff. As I grow older, I find myself yearning for a simpler life…. but I have so much “stuff” I can’t seem to let go of, so how does life get simpler? Ridiculous. Pray for me as I continue to seek the way God wants me to go, as I pray for you.